Csak feküdtem mellette némán. Istent kértem, vigyázzon rá. Adjon neki békét és nyugalmat, amit én nem adhatok. Ölelje át Ő, ahogy most én nem tudom.
Csak hallgatok. Egyet tehetek, mellette maradok.
Ekkor jöttem rá, Isten tudja min megyünk ákeresztül.
Amikor én vergődök, amikor dühös vagyok, mert nem akarom elfogadni az Ő akaratát, Ő is mellettem marad. Mellém fekszik. Némán. Hallgat. Nem könnyíti meg az utam. Nem teszi rövidebbé. Tudja, át kell mennem rajta. De velem van. Mellettem marad. Némán. Csendben vigyáz rám.
kérlek, mondd, hogy nem Robiról szól...
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DeleteI was silent
ReplyDeleteI was lying silently newt to him. I had no words. I didn't even struggled for words. I was silent. I was listening as he was crying in pain and in despair, mourning his broken dreams. I was listening. In silence. Helplessly. I was listening as he was struggling and accusing. I didn't say anything when his accusations were against me. He blamed and hated everyone. Included myself. He was struggling with his anger like a wounded animal. I was not able to dress his wounds. I can't. He doesn't let me. He doesn't want to. These wounds can not be dressed.
I was lying next to him silently. I was asking God to take care of him, give him peace what I can't provide him now. Hold him as I can't hold him now.
I am silent. All I can do is to stay with him.
I just realized that, God knows exactly what are we going through. When I am struggling, when I am angry because I don't want to accept his will, He is staying with me. He is lying next to me. Silently. He is listening. He doesn't make it easier, he doesn't provide shortcuts. He knows that I have to go through all of these. But He is with me. He is staying with me. Silent. He is taking care of me silently.
(translation by Amy)
Köszi. Észre vettem ám, hogy melyik részeket fordítod le rögtön! :)
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